A picture is worth a thousand captions

"Can't you see my veins are exploding?"
"I do not have baby teeth!"
"Sparta! What is your profession?!"(Funnier because he went to U of M)
"I said no mushrooms!"
"Everybody come see how good I look!"
"My skeletal system is escaping!"
"My Speedo is chaffing!"
"I'm tired of shaving my ENTIRE body."
"Carbs! Carbs! Carbs!"
"I am mad as a wet hen!"
"I make you seem lazy!" (It's so true)
"My name is the only thing people will remember about the 2008 Summer Olympics!" (Even truer)
"Fuck this! I'm becoming a florist!"
"My daughter is in pain, can't you understand that! GIVE MY DAUGHTER THE SHOT!"
"Michael hate being three feet taller than Chinese hosts."
"My fuel is pure gold."
"I call shotgun!"
"Give me an M!"
"Look at my innie, ya'll!"
"Who peed in the pool?!"
"Where is my jacket?!"
"My body absorbed my shirt!"
"'My Boys' is a rerun?!"
"Cannonball!"
"Who wants pizza?!"


Seriously, I could do this for days.